?

Log in

No account? Create an account

What's Your Celtic Horoscope?

You Are A Weeping Willow Tree
You are a dreamer, and you're into almost any kind of escapism.
Restless and capricious, you love to travel to exotic places.
You are easily influenced by others, as long as they don't pressure you.
You tend to suffer in love until you find that one loyal, steadfast partner.
An empathetic friend, you love to make others smile and laugh.

Just one of those days

OK since I moved to Texas it has been really great. I have a wonderful townhome apartment that I absolutely adore, my hubby found a great job in less than two weeks time, my kids are excited to be here and have a new cousin to play with and even wildlife to help tend to, and I have gotten to know my Brother and Sister- In-Law who I have to say I already love to death. But today has been a hard day. I have been suffering lately with my cramping situation where it pretty much lays me up. I have been trying to be strong about it so I have been still getting out of bed, being with the kids, doing their assesment testing, cleaning, cooking and all. Well the hubby has to get up around 3 in the morning to be at work. I have been trying my hardest to do it all. I get the kids to take their showers all while making dinner, serve them all, do after dinner dishes, spend the quality time with the kids, get them off to bed, lock up the house, and I get to bed sometime around 11 at night. Well I just want to unwind when I get to bed finally and either watch some Nick at Nite or read but no that is not possible. You see the hubby complains about the TV not letting him sleep or the light from my bedside lamp being too bright and he can't sleep!! Now first of all when we were in Orlando and staying at mom's everynight, I repeat EVERYNIGHT, he played video games which did not let me fall asleep and when I would ask, beg and cry to him about my inability to sleep he never stopped, not once. And if he really needs his sleep so bad why does he go out every single night!!! The kids and I stay home and he goes across the street to his brother's to hang out with them and his parents or to go shoot hoops. I have no problem with his family but when they come before the kids and me I do!! Last night was "Family Game Night". The kids and I played Apples to Apples JR and where was the hubby. He left us and went to shoot hoops. When the in-laws asked where the kids and I were he said that I had planned a game night with the kids. He did not even consider staying. Now he is off again with his mother to the store. Do I go to the store. Hell no!! But she goes all the time. He got off of work today when he finished early and his job is not strenous at all and instead of saying how nice the house looked after I had been cleaning all morning or talk with me or play with the kids he just pointed out how I missed a spot in the kitchen when I was cleaning, shooed the kids to play upstairs and fell asleep. That's right he fell ASLEEP!!! Maybe because instead of going to bed at a reasonable hour knowing full well he had to get up at 3 to go to work he stayed out to play basketball and didn't get enough sleep. Now mind you the dog woke me at 4 in the morning because she was apparently lonely downstairs and than I had to get two little ones back to sleep because she woke them up as well. By that time I was too awake to fall back asleep so I got up, made the bed, cleaned the mess that was left in the bathroom since he can not pick up after himself, discover that when he got home the night before he used the living room as a hamper for all his clothes, made breakfast, and by that time the kids where up, fed them, did school, cleaned the kitchen after the breakfast so I can make lunch, cleaned the mess that was left from school, play with the kids, fold laundry, take out the trash, walk the dog, get a snack for the kids, play with the kids again, watch Nickelodeon with the kids (I love Drake and Josh), make dinner and now on the computer. What he did was drive around Kingsville which is extremely small and deliever tortillas for only 5 hours but gets paid for 8 and it doesn't even require heavy lifting at all!!! I understood with DHL that it was long hours, mostly without break, and lots of heavy lifting. In this job some days he has to travel far but that is all. I just want to scream. Why can't he just realize I need a break? I am lonely most of the time just here with the kids. He takes the car until they give him his own van so I can not go anywhere unless it on foot and I live off a major road so I do not dare walk with three little ones by my self. I have my sister-in-law but besides her I have no friends here and there are times I just want to get away but she is either at work or at her parents 90 miles away!

I know I like it here! I really do. I feel safe, my kids are happy, and the job market is better here than in Florida. But I miss going out with my friends, sisters or mother. I need someone that I can talk to when I am stressed and if I try to talk to the hubby he right away thinks I am miserable here and says that moving was a big mistake and that I blame him for it. I do not believe the move was a mistake. I think there is a reason we moved here and it will be better for us. I just need to vent sometimes. I need to have someone to go to like I used to in Florida. God I pray that I at least find one good friend here. I need it.

Captain's Log

Day 16 on the Alien Planet. Today we observe the ritual known to this species as Superbowl Sunday. Apparently this is an important ritual where this species gather among the living area of their domestic domicile where they gather around the large 42" viewing screen to watch others run around in tight pants (the one true plus of this experience in my opinion) while holding something called a pigskin around a large green field. I wonder why they only carry the skin of the pig and not the whole pig itself. I must ask that question to the head Alien himself when I get a chance. The male of this species I hear gets really hostile if you do even one of the following during the game of Foot and Ball. If you talk (and not about the actual sport itself) they get upset. If you stand or walk too slowly in front of the TV they get upset. If you decide to share your feelings during the game they get upset. And if there is not enough sustenance (chips and soda for this species) they get upset. The female species has several choices during the game of Foot and Ball. She can either sit next to her mate and "pretend" to enjoy the game. She can wrangle the smaller of the species so they do not interrupt the game. Or she can choose to completely ignore the game and read, go to a separate area of the domicile or be in the world of virtual happiness. I will likely observe all the rituals of this widely known event in the alien planet. If I do not report back shortly..................HA who are we kidding I probably won't report back shortly so please don't hold your breath.

OMG!!!

I went to the shooting range with my father, sister, and niece and as we arrive to the shooting range guess who we saw............. DEVON MURRAY!!!! He plays Seamus Finnigan (I hope I spelled that correctly). He is the nicest guy ever!!!!!!! And "accidentally" I grazed his butt. I actually touched his butt!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm White! and in skin color too!!

Whites (Motive: Peace)

Whites are motivated by Peace. They seek independence and require kindness. They resist confrontation at all costs. To them, feeling good is more important than being good. They are typically quiet by nature, process things very deeply and objectively with great clarity. Of all the colors, whites are the best listeners. They respect people who are direct but recoil from perceived hostility or verbal battle.

Whites need their "alone time" and refuse to be controlled by others. whites want to do things their own way and in their own time. They ask little of others and resent others demanding much of them. whites are much stronger than people think, but are not often seen for their strength because they don't easily reveal their feelings. whites are even-tempered, diplomatic, and the voice of reason; but can also be indecisive, unexpressive, and silently stubborn. When you deal with a WHITE, be kind, accept and support their individuality, and look for non-verbal clues to understand their feelings.

 

That is so me!!!!!! This personality test can be confusing when you have to pick an answer and more than one is like you or none seem to match you but it hit the mark with its answer.

Take the quiz it is awesome: colorcode.com


 

It is hard to lose so much

Well hubby lost job back in December and we couldn't afford to stay at our house and pay such a high rent so we lost the house. The house wasn't perfect and had lots of flaws but I hated losing it. Well I am now back at mom's! I am grateful for them giving us a place to stay till we can move to Texas but it is hard. I went from living here for 5 years and then moving out and having my own things, my own place, my own privacy to being back where nothing is mine, I can not have a say to pretty much anything because the house is mom's and my room is the living room. The most privacy I get is the bathroom and even with that I still have someone knocking on the door every now and again because they need to get in there. To top it all off today the hubby had to take the puppies (they are huge but still they are only puppies) to the pound because mom wanted them gone. I understand her point but after losing so much I think this is just too much to take and my heart is just broken. I know it is stupid to get so sentimental over the loss of the dogs after my husband lost his job and we lost the house but I guess it was just the one thing to push me over. I can not bare to have them at the pound when I love them so much.

Than to top it all off my husband acts like he is the only one suffering with this move. I am miserable too. I can't stand to have to depend on someone else like I have to right now with my family. I can't stand having to come back with my tail between my legs feeling like the biggest failure because this damn economy is kicking us in the ass. But instead of supporting one another we seem to be at each other's throats and I can't take it. I want my life back.


I can't believe I am going to say this but I am so excited to move to Texas. I know I will get homesick, lonely and things might be hard at first but I need to be independent. I need to prove that I can handle it. The area we are moving to is a small town and I can not wait to have a small town life. I am so over the "city" life. Where we were living even though I loved the fact I was independent at my house the area was not good. We had two homicide's on our street alone within the last year, drug selling, I believe one of the neighbors was responsible for the death of my beloved boxer and a fire was set behind the house (geez it is a wonder why the hell I loved the house...LOL). I could not allow my kids out to play 80% of the time and I can not wait for a safe area where my kids will grow up right. I homeschool the kids and in Texas it is better to homeschool and the opportunities my family can have over there are better than here. My husband finally can be with family, my kids education will excel because the universities in Texas accept homeschool children where in Florida they can only get into one and, I know I will be happier raising my kids in a better environment for them.

Merry Christmas to ALL!

I just wanted to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas. We here at the Perez house are just enjoying the time we have together and trying to cherish every second of it!!

So I hope everyone gets what they truly wish for in their hearts. Enjoy the time with love ones. And don't forget to spread a little joy and happiness to everyone you come in contact with.


HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY LITTLE CHRISTMAS!!

A Time For Thanksgiving

In this time of year it is good to remember back on all that we have. It is good to remember the blessings that God has given us and even to remember the difficult times because only through them do we learn what God has for us. This year has seen us with many joys: Hubby got his job back at DHL, I was able to stay home again and even begin homeschooling the three joys of my life. We have had many fun and happy memories like our first trip to the zoo, countless family dinners on Sundays at Grandma's house with the cousins, and even maxride's very first midnight movie premiere to see: Twilight. My youngest learned to read and the girls are continuing to excel in their education like always. In sad moments we have lost yet another matriarch to our family but also rejoice in the fact that she is in her new heavenly home with the love of her life. We lost our beloved dog, Macho, but also gained his children. Soon the hubby will have to look for another job but I choose to not accept this as a downfall any longer. I know this will lead us on a new adventure. One that I do not know where it will lead us but together as a family we can overcome with love, faith and God's helping hand. God has been good to us. He has helped us each and every step holding our hands and guiding us. He has carried us through the rough times and walked along side us in the great times. I truly give thanks to God for all we have, all we don't and all things that are yet to come.

Rest In Peace...MACHO

Today is a dark day. My baby, my protector, the best dog ever has left this world. We got Macho on February 17, 2006. He was one of a liter of 12. He followed my daughter around and even though I had at first picked what was the runt of the liter and my husband had his eye on one of the girls after we saw how much Macho wanted to come home with us there was no question that he was the dog for us. We brought him home throwing names left and right at what we should call him. The people we got him from called him lefty because the white on his face went to the left. Macho won the vote and we all loved him dearly. He was easy to house train and so lovable. In March after just barely a month of having him someone from our neighborhood stole him. Our hearts broke but we never gave up hope of finding him. It was Spring Break and the kids and I looked him all day while the hubby would look for him all night. Four days later we found him and brought him back home. Macho was the most loyal, most caring, easy tempered dog. He would defend me when he sensed that there might even be any kind of danger. The hubby would pretend to come at me and Macho would stand between us blocking me. He grew fast. He was strong, healthy and playful. The eternal puppy. Our daughter would lay with him with his paws around her like he was hugging her and he would fall asleep. He loved to go for walks with daddy and greet the neighbors. Three days ago Macho started feeling a bit sick. He progressively got worse and this morning my husband and I awoke both sensing something was desperately wrong with Macho. He was not with us in the room and my husband went to him. He was just laying there. When my husband called his name he raised his head but did not have the strength to move. He was in shock. My husband picked him up and brought him to the room. Macho could not stand but insisted on trying. He would stand and take a few steps before collapsing. He was so weak. We got the kids and rushed to the local Animal Hospital. There I called for my mother to pick up the kids. I could not stand to let the kids witness any of this any longer. Once the kids left I went to the exam room. They informed us that they could treat him with a slim to none chance of his recovery or we can euthanize him. He was in so much pain and suffering so much that we just chose to end his misery. They asked if we wanted to be present or not. Even though it was one of the hardest things I had witnessed I could not let my baby die alone without us. He received the injections (2 of them) and ceased to breathe. His eyes never closed. He stayed looking at daddy as he took his last breath. His heart continued though so they administered one more shot. Within minutes his gentle doggy heart ceased to beat as well. He died at 9:35 am. There is a brand new doggy angel in heaven.

Macho: you were the best dog ever, you were loved immensely, you will always be in our hearts. Rest In Peace my sweet doggy angel. Love, Mommy!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

Today was my birthday. My husband got up and went to get dressed for work around 6 am. My brother in law was calling him and since he was not in the room the phone ringing woke me up. He left for work and even though I was awake did not say Happy Birthday to me at all. Just said goodbye. He texts me a rather generic Happy Birthday message. I guess I don't deem worthy enough to get a phone call. Not even a cute text if he were so busy to call me. He didn't come home for lunch either to spend time with me. Normally I don't really care but it is my Birthday. One of my best friends calls me to "wish" me a Happy Birthday and then proceeds to tell me all about her drama with her so called man and his ex who are still apparently having sex. What a great talk that was to have on my Birthday. I have never been one to deny that I don't like gossip but the kind I like are the celebrity type gossip. Than after that my mom calls. She was actually really cute and made me laugh when she reminded me that this was my second Quincenera and Sweet Sixteen together. I like that one. But than we talked about her work drama. Normally I do not mind but I did not want to deal with anything today of all days. My kids cherished that there was no school today but while they were happy about that they didn't really want to be with mom they wanted to play video games or get online. I'm not really talking to my other best friend after yesterday. My kids and I had plans to attend a field trip at the Science Center here in Orlando. She insisted on going. So we went and the Science Center lost my reservation. Needless to say we were not able to stay unless we paid the $150 membership!! I thought that was ridiculous and seeing the face on my kids faces made me feel horrible. My best friend did not help matters by constantly reminding me of the error in making the reservation and than she complained about going to the park for a picnic, she didn't bring her own food so we had to share mine and she didn't like the sandwich I made (turkey, ham, cheese, spinach, and tomatoes). She complained about the heat, the rain and the kids hyperness. She told them they could go to the movie theater and didn't even take them. We go to the library. I told her that I needed to at least make it educational and not that they just look and read books. I talked to the librarian and we worked with the computers to learn how to locate books in the library. She just sat there and didn't help or participate. Than she constantly kept complaining saying how annoying my kids are and how my son, her godson, asked to spend the night again with her and how she can not handle him so she has to avoid him. I know my son is hyper but he is my son and I do not appreciate being told that he is annoying!! I am never going anywhere again with her and my kids. That was rude and disrespectful!!

I just wanted to enjoy my birthday. I had told my husband that all I wanted was to celebrate it and told him months ago! He made the plans one week in advance, didn't have money for the party so he was going to cancel it, and when I get there (late because the best friend I was with didn't want to show up on time to make my other best friend have to wait 2 hours on me getting there) my father had to leave. I only said hi and bye to him. Everyone was just doing there own thing and not that I wanted to be selfish but I just wanted one day when the actual focus was on me. I celebrate mother's day and do so with my mother and sister. I celebrate my anniversary (once in a blue moon) and it is about my husband and me. I never have anything that is just me. I thought I could be like the queen for the day and instead I was more in the background. And than to top it all off! My best friend, the first one I talked about, has a very sexy nature to her. My husband barely said two words to me during my "party" yet when she would read her cards when we were playing a board game he would go out of his way to point out how sexy she sounded. Hell he even recorded her voice on his cell!! I told him how hurt I felt about that and he said "Geez it was a joke. Anthony was doing it too". He just can't understand that I for once wanted to be the one he, if no one else did, to focus on me. I didn't get a gift from him, a card, hell even a homemade card would have been nice. All I got was a so called party where it felt more like a usual Sunday afternoon at my mom's house and not to be with him at all (he never even sat next to me), he made no real comment about my new clothes, and he went out of his way to point out how sexy my best friend sounded.

I hated this birthday. I have hated each birthday since I can not even remember. I think from now on I will erase September 9th from my life.